Seriously...!! I can't be the only one out there who feels this way.... and its kind of troubling to think about really....
If clarity isn't all that 'normal' in terms of our everyday experience then what the hell is filling in the blanks between this "moment of clarity" and the next one...??
Are we continually in a state of foggy thinking and base level behavior...??
Who knows.... I feel its a -forest from the trees- kind of deal... You get used to things or conditions or whatever and you slowly forget about them.... well not entirley... but at least up to a point where you 'decide' to store them in some kind of back-burner area in your mind... Then routines simply play out and our minds drift off into some kind of ethereal slumber, ie the blank areas, as we skip along -or drag- from this task to the next...
Makes me think of humans in a much more zombie-fied kinda way I guess....
Oh well..... Zombies seem to be pretty cool these days.....
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
"Laffoley and Me: as an action figure"
Just messing around.... Small homage to Paul Laffoley, owls and old vintage action figures... and I guess my face too....
Saturday, November 27, 2010
"FREE TO LEAVE"
(click on image to zoom) OK... So I reworked "FREE TO LEAVE" and revamped the accompanying audio as well... I did so in light of a new show I just had last week which went fantastic I thought...
so here it is....
Enjoy :)
post script: "COSMIC LINEAGE" is only half way done, still working on the audio, but I'll post it up anyway....
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Getting Older: WTF Yo...!!!
So here I am on a mid Wednesday after noon... Just chilln at this really kick ass spot in Seminole Heights... Which is in Tampa for all you non-Tampons... Anyhow, its a dope little beer house with a good number of quality stuff on tap as well as a huge variety of bottled beer too... And in addition to those gastric nectors they also have the best bar/cafe food around... seriously..!! crazy good... so if you're ever just South of Hillsborough on Florida... check it out yo...!!
GOOD STUFF...!!!
http://www.facebook.com/IndependentBarTampa
Ok now on to biggy and better things... Well I guess that's more of a perspective thing right..?? Big to me, small to you..??? Tomato or Toe-mato...???
I think its funny how in certain respects we can feel like we know 'too much' and then in literally hours we can feel the exact opposite... "I don't know shit..!!"
Am I alone on this one...??
Don't want to be to verbose because I'm highly capable of that at times... I think its a genetic thing (thanks Dad..!!)
Anyhow, today I was thinking about a few things. More personal in nature I guess. I 'm sure you already know that 'age' and 'time' are a couple strange cats... I mean my mind is stuck in this fairly small, seemingly self contained, little world... I experience things in a very unique way just as the next person... now the interesting thing is time really doesn't exert any undue force upon us when you really think about it... now the experience of time and the experience of this moment to the next is what illuminates the tapestry of time... I mean what happens if a individual, god forbid, lived a whole lifetime without any exposure to outside stimulus; that being the catalyst for experience and context....??? Would age or time exert more force upon the individual in terms of the process of a slow physical decline...?? Could he or she perceive the aging process...?? Now I'm highly doubtful this experiment would even work because this individual would most likely die with out human contact but for the sake of this mental experiment lets just say it is possible...
That was a little off topic but somehow I feel it is related... Anyhow, what I'm dealing with now is the juxtaposition between this concept of aging in conjunction with the experience of time elapsed... I know the body ages but what happens to our minds...?? and I'm not talking about the physiological effects, nor even the psychological/cognitive effects, of aging upon the brain but rather something more related to ones perception of reality... How does it change and does it change and what spurs on change in that respect...?? I know it does change but I have a gut hunch there's a pattern to all this...
Put is this way... As one ages how does one perceive that aging/changing in respect to their world view, their understanding of morals/ethics, to their level of tolerance or intolerance, to their level of concern for their fellow man...?? as we age do our minds and attitudes change to a level that benefits the soul...??? Do the changes we allow to take place within our hearts and minds do they really assist us in our understanding of joy, happiness, and contentment...???
I know this is kind of a personal thing... I mean it sounds like its one of those "well it would be up to that person how he or she would allow them selves to change" and I would agree to a large degree on that conclusion....
However... I think there's more to it than that... FREE WILL is a very debatable topic... it drives us nuts to the very core of who we are as a species but the fundamentals of the question -Does free will exist? - remains largely unanswered....
So here I am, 32, feeling sorta old but knowing I'm not... I'm left in this lingering fog of doubt that has subtly seeped into the peaks and valleys of my mind... Obscuring what I once thought so strongly about and calling into question the many paths, routes and hidden doorways I've decided to navigate in these last few years of aging... I know all the sights and sounds during these navigations down new and novel roads and destinations has rendered an affect and change in my person and mind... now the question is... have those changes benefited me...?? and if not where do I go from here....??
I wrote something down in my phone last week that just popped into my mind:
"I need to get lost again, because I haven't found anything new in a long time"
Ok.... That's it for me...
Another slig to light and another daydream to ponder...
GOOD STUFF...!!!
http://www.facebook.com/IndependentBarTampa
Ok now on to biggy and better things... Well I guess that's more of a perspective thing right..?? Big to me, small to you..??? Tomato or Toe-mato...???
I think its funny how in certain respects we can feel like we know 'too much' and then in literally hours we can feel the exact opposite... "I don't know shit..!!"
Am I alone on this one...??
Don't want to be to verbose because I'm highly capable of that at times... I think its a genetic thing (thanks Dad..!!)
Anyhow, today I was thinking about a few things. More personal in nature I guess. I 'm sure you already know that 'age' and 'time' are a couple strange cats... I mean my mind is stuck in this fairly small, seemingly self contained, little world... I experience things in a very unique way just as the next person... now the interesting thing is time really doesn't exert any undue force upon us when you really think about it... now the experience of time and the experience of this moment to the next is what illuminates the tapestry of time... I mean what happens if a individual, god forbid, lived a whole lifetime without any exposure to outside stimulus; that being the catalyst for experience and context....??? Would age or time exert more force upon the individual in terms of the process of a slow physical decline...?? Could he or she perceive the aging process...?? Now I'm highly doubtful this experiment would even work because this individual would most likely die with out human contact but for the sake of this mental experiment lets just say it is possible...
That was a little off topic but somehow I feel it is related... Anyhow, what I'm dealing with now is the juxtaposition between this concept of aging in conjunction with the experience of time elapsed... I know the body ages but what happens to our minds...?? and I'm not talking about the physiological effects, nor even the psychological/cognitive effects, of aging upon the brain but rather something more related to ones perception of reality... How does it change and does it change and what spurs on change in that respect...?? I know it does change but I have a gut hunch there's a pattern to all this...
Put is this way... As one ages how does one perceive that aging/changing in respect to their world view, their understanding of morals/ethics, to their level of tolerance or intolerance, to their level of concern for their fellow man...?? as we age do our minds and attitudes change to a level that benefits the soul...??? Do the changes we allow to take place within our hearts and minds do they really assist us in our understanding of joy, happiness, and contentment...???
I know this is kind of a personal thing... I mean it sounds like its one of those "well it would be up to that person how he or she would allow them selves to change" and I would agree to a large degree on that conclusion....
However... I think there's more to it than that... FREE WILL is a very debatable topic... it drives us nuts to the very core of who we are as a species but the fundamentals of the question -Does free will exist? - remains largely unanswered....
So here I am, 32, feeling sorta old but knowing I'm not... I'm left in this lingering fog of doubt that has subtly seeped into the peaks and valleys of my mind... Obscuring what I once thought so strongly about and calling into question the many paths, routes and hidden doorways I've decided to navigate in these last few years of aging... I know all the sights and sounds during these navigations down new and novel roads and destinations has rendered an affect and change in my person and mind... now the question is... have those changes benefited me...?? and if not where do I go from here....??
I wrote something down in my phone last week that just popped into my mind:
"I need to get lost again, because I haven't found anything new in a long time"
Ok.... That's it for me...
Another slig to light and another daydream to ponder...
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Sailing the Seas of Cheese
Ok so I'm finally following through on something for a change.... A blog... ahhh did I just say that...? sounds so lame doesn't it..?!?! Well I am...
But 1st I should clarify my main reason for this blogging endeavor, that is if I can even stick to it... Mainly I need to write and express and create stuff for therapeutic reasons... I think of the mind as a kind of reservoir. Always receiving more information but at the same time trying to balance the input with the output... I'm talking about the output just like a floodgate on a damn on a reservoir...
For me I speaking more specifically to some hobbies of mine which I had forgotten were so important for me in the past in terms of their positive affects upon my mental and emotional state... These 'hobbies' are just additional valves, floodgates, overflow damns for the reservoir of thoughts and emotions in my mind... I just can't handle too much clutter in my brain I've concluded... So I need to do a better job and make a conscious effort to keep things flowing smoothly in the ol noggin...
I'm glad I've recently discovered this but at the same time it would have saved me so much mental grief and psychological anxiety if I had know this earlier in life... Long story short I think too much and if I don't do a good job of regulating some output, releasing some of the pressure from a flooding reservoir of thoughts and emotions I'll go crazy... and that's no exaggeration... seriously....
Well that's my main reason but it'll take me a while to warm up to the whole process so I'll revisit this at another time...
Moving on.... I'm in a fairly good mood tonight, just so you know...
So that's it for now... short and sweet... but trust me I'll be back with some priceless gibberish full of wise words you'll want to share with your children's children.... no joke....
That's all world...
Sleep tight...
But 1st I should clarify my main reason for this blogging endeavor, that is if I can even stick to it... Mainly I need to write and express and create stuff for therapeutic reasons... I think of the mind as a kind of reservoir. Always receiving more information but at the same time trying to balance the input with the output... I'm talking about the output just like a floodgate on a damn on a reservoir...
For me I speaking more specifically to some hobbies of mine which I had forgotten were so important for me in the past in terms of their positive affects upon my mental and emotional state... These 'hobbies' are just additional valves, floodgates, overflow damns for the reservoir of thoughts and emotions in my mind... I just can't handle too much clutter in my brain I've concluded... So I need to do a better job and make a conscious effort to keep things flowing smoothly in the ol noggin...
I'm glad I've recently discovered this but at the same time it would have saved me so much mental grief and psychological anxiety if I had know this earlier in life... Long story short I think too much and if I don't do a good job of regulating some output, releasing some of the pressure from a flooding reservoir of thoughts and emotions I'll go crazy... and that's no exaggeration... seriously....
Well that's my main reason but it'll take me a while to warm up to the whole process so I'll revisit this at another time...
Moving on.... I'm in a fairly good mood tonight, just so you know...
- Florida nights are getting pretty freakn perfect
- My Fantasy Football team the Dope Fiends Anonymous finally got a win by 20+ points after back to back loses in the last two weeks by a grand total of 3 points... yes, much needed...
- And lastly... just cuz tonight seemed like a good night for a good mood... you know how that goes..
So that's it for now... short and sweet... but trust me I'll be back with some priceless gibberish full of wise words you'll want to share with your children's children.... no joke....
That's all world...
Sleep tight...
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